Why I talk like I do.

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Pencil note, scribbled in a passably legible hand. Dated 3/6/08
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I got ta thinkin, after some laughin yesterday. I don’t talk pretty, I don’t get some of tha tricky double meanins of words sometimes. I think I do awright but. Thing is, I learnt ta talk after getting yanked from Melbourne Zoo by tha DSTO goons who dropped me off to tha 7RAR-L. What’s tha big deal ya ask? How long did it take ya ta learn ta talk? When did ya start? How many kids were in ya class? Did ya family all come around ta see ya? Let me tell ya, that’s not how it went fer me.

They got a special program fer us ferrals, tha Four-Leggers, ta educate and train. It'd start with another , older Shifter cominin and establishin dominance, and communicatin like that, buildin a bond. Same one came in when I was Fleshie and did tha same till I got it. Then there was object ID: ball, box, chair. Kids stuff. Just like any Fleshie family would, I guess, except I was full grown. A man ta look at. Retarded, some mighta thought, some stupid enough ta say after I learnt what it meant. Eventually they got tha picture. As soon as I was good enough ta get taught other stuff say, sam Trainin. Took about a year ta get there. I got lots of exercise durrin that year too, mind, and Shiftin practice, so I could take all my forms as I pleased, Moon phase allowin. I'm a fast learner. I read slow, but I never had much ta read or time ta do it in.

When I 'graduated' from talkin school I had been house-trained and given tha basics of Fleshie social skills. Only as much as was needed fer a Drill Sergeant ta work with. All that "Sir, yes Sir" stuff, military indoctrantion, weapons and tactics and tha like. That’s when I got tha specialized anti-non-human trainin too. With that came folklore, myth and both sciency and arcane learnin. How did all thif affect how I talk? Well, I learnt ta talk proper in tha baracks, with tha other Snarls. I been told I swear a lot, well, what did ya fuckin think, I was gunna do? Stuck way out in tha bush 2 days run from a town, on a secret Army base inland north Queensland.

Tha other thing I got was movies. Unlike my Two-Leg cousins, I never grew up in Fleshie society, fer better or worse. That meant I didn't "get" a lot of thins about how Feshies did stuff, and they couldn't afford ta let me lose in public, we got kept on-base any time we weren't in-country. So I got ta watch a lot of movies. Some of them were even required learnin. Platoon, Full Metal Jacket, Rambo: First Blood, Sniper, Heartbreak Ridge, Hamburger Hill, Gladiator, Navy SEALS, Predator, Henry V, Black Hawk Down, We Were Soldiers, 300, Dog Soldiers, Galipolli, Tha Light Horsemen, Aliens, Soldier, Patton, Tha Battle of Tha Bulge. All kinds of good stuff in there. Taught me all kinds of thins about Fleshie society and how ta be a good soldier. How ta talk socialy. How ta interact with civilians.

So if ya wonder some time why I talk like I do, think who taught me ta, and how.